Cambridge, MA - A new study from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology proves that God hates the same people as you do. Not only does the Almighty despise the same people as you do, but He pretty much shares your opinion on politics, music, and sports.
"Billions of believers are correct when they think God is on their side," said Professor Andrew Canard lead author of the study, Statistical Evidence for God Having The Same Opinion As His Worshippers. "I really don't know how God can do it, but He is after all, all-powerful."
The Study's Methods: Testing The Faithful
The research team questioned hundreds of millions of Christians, Muslims, Buddhists, and Jews. The questions focused on the individual's tastes, opinions, and preferences. They expressed their innermost thoughts and feelings on a one to seven scale with one representing a strong dislike and seven indicating strongly liked. Answers were sorted into general categories.
Here are a few examples of a query and in parenthesis the general category it was grouped into:
- Owning assault weapons is the best way to Americanize a home. (Politics)
- Football games are won by the side whose fans pray the most. (Sports)
- Billionaires are job creators. They need as much taxpayer money as possible. (Economics)