Friday, January 21, 2022

10 Reasons Why Vladimir Putin Is Invading Ukraine


10. My dog ate it. ("It" being human rights.)

 9. It's not you. It's me.

 8. I just need some space.

 7. Boys will be boys. (Russia is "boys.")

 6. Ukraine doesn't know what's best for Ukraine.

 5. In Ukraine, you don't get vodka. Vodka gets you.

 4. That's just the way I found it -- part of USSR.

 3. Cat knocked Ukraine into Russia.

 2. It looked too good not to eat.

 1. Is that wrong? No one told me.

In related news, COVID-19 shows us how smart horror movie characters are.